Help Wanted

Lauren and Ashton Mills know their mother is dying of cancer. The 10-year-old twins from Oxford, England, not wanting to be placed with a random foster family when the time comes, have advertised for a new family in the local newspaper. “Kids and dog for hire,” the ad in the “Situations Vacant” category read. “Life term contract.” However, the girls aren’t interested in pity. “Sad gits need not apply,” the ad warned. Thousands of people have responded. (Reuters) ...If they’re anything like the typical people who reply to singles ads, don’t bother, kids!