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SINCE 1994 and reaching more than 110,000 readers in over 200 countries, this is the 723th weekly issue of... THIS is TRUE: 20 April 2008 Copyright http://www.thisistrue.com ------------------------------------------------------------------------- GOOD CLEAN FUN: The Purple Door, a lap dancing club in Newcastle, England, has applied for a permit to install a shower -- on its stage. City Councillor Geoff O'Brien is against the shower, claiming it "pushes the boundaries" of decency. "I have never heard of any other clubs with shower booths in the country," O'Brien complained. "It begs the question what we will get next?" (South Shields Gazette) ...Scantily-clad dancers on stage: fine and dandy entertainment. Scantily-clad dancers in the shower on stage: the end of decency as we know it. LEGAL BRIEFS: Female lawyers in London, England, are upset that local firms are banning wearing fishnet stockings, calling them "unprofessional" attire. "My male partners openly coo when I'm wearing Jimmy Choos, short skirts and nicely cut tops," complained one on an online forum, since it helps display "the quality of bird they've attracted to the partnership." Another posted that she wondered if "I detect a hint of jealousy among the frumps that can't get away with it?" And a partner at another firm asked, "Why is everyone getting their knickers in such a twist over this?" (London Daily Mail) ...Getting their knickers in a twist isn't the problem. It's when everyone can see they're twisted that it's a problem. ----------==========**********O**********==========---------- Need to get more value out of LinkedIn.com? I'm on LinkedIn -- Now What??? is the book that cuts through the fluff. Still scratching your head over LinkedIn? Buy the book at http://www.ImOnLinkedInNowWhat.com ----------==========**********O**********==========---------- GOOOOD MOOOOD: Rob Taverner, who runs a farm just outside Exeter, Devon, England, has taught his cows tai chi. "I want to make sure I am as relaxed and focused as possible," the organic farmer said. "As organic farmers we believe happier cows produce better milk." (Exeter Express & Echo) ...And if you think that's good, just wait until you taste the tai cheese! SURPRISE PACKAGE: A man in Illovo, Johannesburg, South Africa, picked up a prostitute and took her to a hotel. The hooker refused to strip, so the man grabbed her. "Let's just say that when he touched her he realized he wasn't touching a woman," said police Inspector Moses Maphakela. "The man realized the prostitute was strong, so he paid 300 Rand (US$51) and told him to get out," the police inspector said. Police got involved when the man realized his cell phone was missing and reported the theft to police. While he was at the station the hooker arrived to file an assault complaint. The prosecutor declared the two even and dropped both charges. Still, the police inspector was impressed by the transvestite. "The prostitute was wearing a tiny skirt and wore so much make-up, there was no way you could tell it was a man," he said. (South Africa Independent) ...That depends on how tight his skirt was. YEAH, THAT'LL WORK: "Sex Offender Runs for Mayor, Hopes Voters Overlook Arrest" -- Austin (Texas) American Statesman headline DID YOU FIND an error? See http://www.thisistrue.com/errata.html WAS BROKEN: TRUE's shopping cart and archive were broken last weekend (geek: SQL table corruption). It's fixed now. Thanks to those who let me know. That's particularly important to those who were trying to order the special on the Get Out Of Hell Free laser-engraved solid oak sticky notepad holder (with two custom GOOHF stick notepads), just $16 plus shipping at https://secure.thisistrue.com ONLY through the end of the month (Last Call!) ONE RECURRING COMMENT I get from readers is how my stories show how wacky Americans are -- they don't seem to notice the foreign stories. I decided to make this issue "All Foreign" to help remind you that it's *people* that are wacky, not just Americans. My ideal is for each issue to be half stories based in the U.S., and the other half everywhere else combined. The Premium edition was just that this week, but I can't always find enough good foreign stories -- at least, good ones that I can read: I not only require "mainstream, legitimate" newspapers as my sources, but they have to be in English, since that's the only language I can read with any precision whatever. Most of the stories posted by readers on Groxx are U.S. based. I'd definitely like more from outside the U.S., so consider this an invitation to post more. (One coming up in Groxx popularity today: man advertises for a drinking companion in London: he's paying 7 pounds (US$14) per hour -- plus, one presumes, the drinks.) Groxx is one of my story queues where I find the "good stuff". With free registration, you can submit stories as well as vote on which ones you see there are best. http://Groxx.com o o o REPORTERS AND PUBLICISTS (if you're not interested in either, you can skip this section): Reporters need to find good sources when they're writing stories. One of the jobs of publicists is to get clients with relevant information in front of reporters working on stories. The reporter gets the needed quotes, the client gets a bit of publicity -- a win-win. There's a service that sends out such inquiries to publicists and "sources" who want to go through them, but it costs a LOT to get those leads. Enter the Internet: there's finally a good and free service for this. Called "Help a Reporter Out", it was launched just six weeks ago, and it already has 6,000 people getting the leads. It's run by Peter Shankman, a NYC publicist. He bundles up the queries from journalists and sends them out about three times a day. Several have been relevant to me, like a guy writing a book on unusual virtual marketing success stories. TRUE (and my "Get Out of Hell Free" cards!) was right up his alley. If you're a publicist or "source", get on his e-mail list by signing up at http://www.HelpAReporter.com -- it's free, it doesn't take much time, and it might get you (or a client) some great exposure. It's also easy to get OFF the mailing list if it turns out not to be what you want: he uses the terrific AWeber service for distribution, the same one I use for update notifications on Jumbo Joke (and Cranky Customer, and new blog posts) -- http://www.ThisIsTrue.net/d-aweber And if you're a reporter, there's a form on the site for you to make a request, and get responses within hours. Shankman pounds on the sources to ONLY respond if they have truly relevant info to share. There's even an anonymous option if needed (Shankman will forward relevant queries). And hey, if you're a reporter, remember me as a source: not just about e-mail publishing, weird news, spam, viral marketing and more, but I have top-notch contacts for just about *anything* to do with doing business online. :-) o o o I'M STILL WORKING on going through back issues of TRUE and pulling out the "Best Of" the comments in this section for my online archive -- my blog. Last night I added these, from 2004: http://www.thisistrue.com/blog-whats_in_a_number.html -- I manage to land a new address that's particularly good for taking orders for GOOHF cards. http://www.thisistrue.com/blog-a_failure_to_grasp_reality.html -- I get a phone call from a total, complete, jibbering IDIOT. http://www.thisistrue.com/blog-proof_im_a_stinking_liberal.html -- I watched Ronald Reagan's funeral on TV this week ...and therefore I'm a nasty liberal who deserves hatred from Republicans. http://www.thisistrue.com/blog-trues_ten_year_anniversary.html -- TRUE celebrates 10 years online ...and another spinoff web site. http://www.thisistrue.com/blog-another_spinoff_site.html -- Oh: I need ANOTHER spinoff web site! And some "psychic pay" from readers. http://www.thisistrue.com/blog-separated_by_a_common_language.html -- Watch out London: I'm coming over! http://www.thisistrue.com/blog-live_free_or_whine.html -- Reader whines that I'm going on a business trip. Really! At least readers get more entertainment at his expense. AND AMONG THE LATEST postings to Jumbo Joke: "Over 60" Perspectives. http://www.JumboJoke.com ----------==========**********O**********==========---------- DVD Interviews with WWII Vets and MORE Documentary "LAST STAND OF USS HOUSTON" "Christmas Memories - 1944" - Battle of The Bulge Vets Wonderful Relaxation Videos for the elderly or children's nap time Find these as well as free online veteran interviews at http://www.buzzcreek.com ----------==========**********O**********==========---------- YOU MISSED THE U.S. STORIES this week, including: New state law is the first step toward implementing Ray Bradbury's "Fahrenheit 451". Woman steps out of shower, sits on her bed, and finds man staring at her from her closet -- and the jury acquits him of all charges! ZT in action: security guard stops a teen shoplifter stealing booze ...and is fired for it. The Premium edition has DOUBLE the stories of the free edition, and keeps TRUE going. http://www.thisistrue.com/upgrade.html has more. TEN YEARS AGO IN TRUE: Man rescues couple's dog, but they then leave him to (nearly) die: http://www.thisistrue.com/man_s_best_friend_5923.html -- yes, another foreign story. :-) BONZER WEB SITE OF THE WEEK: http://www.AnimatedKnots.com -- Animated Knots by Grog. You've found that great armoire and it's on the back of your pickup truck; the only thing left is to secure your load. If your skill with a rope stops at the granny knot, you need to check out this site. Excellent animations and written instructions take you through all the knots you need, sorted into convenient categories including household, boating, climbing and decorative. There is a great section on rope care which shows you how to avoid those useless frayed ends on your rope. With a little practice you will be able to amaze passers-by at IKEA by executing a trucker's hitch using a rope with perfectly whipped and burned ends. So go and get knotted! (ME) -- Bonzer Sites archive: http://www.BonzerSites.com THIS WEEK'S HONORARY UNSUBSCRIBE goes to Germaine Tillion. An anthropologist, Tillion was studying the Berbers in Algeria when Germany invaded France in World War II. She returned to Paris to help organize the French Resistance. She was betrayed by a priest and arrested by the Nazis. Sent to the Ravensbruck concentration camp, she was the only one of the organizers of her cell to survive. While living in the camp, she taught other prisoners history, and wrote a plan to reform education in France after the war. In the 1950s, Saadi Yacef, the leader of Algeria's National Liberation Front, asked Tillion to intercede in its war of independence against France. She worked to ensure France didn't let Algeria wallow in poverty, and fought against France's use of torture of Algerian prisoners, comparing it to "specters of the Gestapo." In return, Yacef ordered his troops to stand down, which they did until he was overthrown. Tillion was one of only five women to receive the Grand Cross of the Legion of Honor. She died April 19 at her home in France. She was 100. -- Honorary Unsubscribe archive: http://www.HonoraryUnsubscribe.com I NEED YOUR HELP: Please send this issue (in its entirety, please) to a friend with your personal recommendation. A friend told YOU about this newsletter, right? Pass the favor on! Links to TRUE from your site or blog help too. Thanks. TIRED OF BEING TOLD WHERE TO GO? "Get Out of Hell Free" with our popular and (in?)famous cards, created in response to a reader telling Randy he was doomed. http://www.GOOHF.com SUBSCRIPTIONS to "This is True" are free at http://www.thisistrue.com Published weekly by ThisIsTrue.Inc, PO Box 666, Ridgway CO 81432 USA (ISSN 1521-1932). TRUE is available to newspapers as a regular feature column. "This is True" is a registered trademark of ThisIsTrue.Inc COPYRIGHT 2008 by Randy Cassingham, All Rights Reserved. All stories are completely rewritten by Randy Cassingham using facts from the noted sources. ALL broadcast, publication, retransmission to e-mail lists, WWW or any other copying or storage, in any medium, online or not, is STRICTLY PROHIBITED without PRIOR written permission from the author. MANUAL FORWARDING by e-mail to friends is allowed IF 1) the text is forwarded IN ITS ENTIRETY, from the "Since 1994" line on top through the end of this paragraph and 2) NO FEE is charged. 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