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SINCE 1994 and reaching at least 42,444 subscribers, this is the 919th weekly issue of Randy Cassingham's... THIS is TRUE: 22 January Copyright 2012 http://www.thisistrue.com ------------------------------------------------------------------------- BEST EXCUSE EVER: Security at the JC Penney store in the Provo (Utah) Towne Centre Mall spotted Leah Efay Davis, 32, placing several items in a store bag. They say they watched her leave without paying, stopped her, and found nearly $600 worth of merchandise. Davis claimed to have a valid excuse: she told police she owned the mall, was eight months pregnant, and -- the clincher -- she had played Rudy Huxtable on "The Cosby Show". That character, however, was played by actress Keisha Knight Pulliam. Davis was charged with retail theft -- enhanced to a felony because of prior shoplifting convictions. (MS/Salt Lake Tribune) ...Had she actually been Rudy, the whole matter would have been resolved in 22 minutes with an important lesson learned. HEY EVERYBODY, LOOK AT THIS! Several people in Rock Island, Ill., were passing around something for everyone to admire: a 12ga shotgun. As various people posed with the gun for photos, the shotgun -- obviously loaded -- discharged, shooting Zachary Inman, 18, in the leg. A police cruiser happened to drive by shortly after, and someone flagged it down, and they called for an ambulance. The gun's apparent owner, Matthew Nazari, 18, was charged with being a felon in possession of a firearm, and other charges may be pending. (RC/Quad-City Times) ..."I was posing with it and it went off" is even dumber than the cleaning excuse. ----------==========**********O**********==========---------- FLOORED BY REMODELING DECISIONS? Get answers to your questions about flooring options: How do you wade through the sales hype? The Flooring Lady, an independent flooring expert, will help you wind your way through the maze. http://www.TheFlooringLady.com Our "Sister Site" has information about window coverings: http://www.TheWindowCoveringLady.com ----------==========**********O**********==========---------- MATERNAL INSTINCTS: Josefa Lopez, 80, asked her daughter, Teresa Medina, to give her a ride to the taping of a TV show. But before they could leave Lopez's Hialeah, Fla., driveway, a man grabbed Medina by the arm and pulled her out of the driver's seat. Then, Lopez says, the man started shouting "Give me" as he pulled her to the ground by her hair and started kicking her and hitting her with a gun. That was when Lopez charged him. "I thought she was dead," Lopez said. "I yelled at him, 'I am going to kill you, son of a bitch!' I wasn't myself." She hit him with her cane, and the man fled, taking Medina's purse with him. Medina had scrapes and bruises on her arms and back, and a large bruise under her eye, but was otherwise unharmed. Although she acknowledges she could have been killed, the 4-foot-9-inch Lopez says she would do it again. "When you see your daughter in trouble," she said, "you have to do something." Her daughter, by the way, is 61. (MS/South Florida Sun- Sentinel) ...NEVER get between a mother and her child -- no matter the age or species. COCKY CRIMINAL: Three years ago, Danny Pham, now 36, was arrested on Super Bowl Sunday after police found a cockfighting operation behind his Lake Worth, Fla., home. Pham said he was watching football and didn't know what was going on in his yard -- claiming he wasn't aware of the arena set up there, nor the 89 roosters that were being used for fights. Apparently that excuse didn't work: he's on probation from the case, including a prohibition from possessing any animals. Pham has been arrested again: suspicious postal authorities called in Palm Beach County animal control officers because a live rooster had been mailed to Pham. When Pham picked the bird up, sheriff's deputies were waiting. He told officers that the box in his hand with air holes and marked "Live Animal" was "not his chicken." He was arrested on a charge of probation violation. (RC/Palm Beach Post) ...Given: Pham, and a rooster. Your task: determine which one has more brains. INTERESTING INTERPRETATIONS: "Active-Duty Soldiers Take Their Own Lives at Record Rate" -- New York Times headline "Army Suicide Rates Decline for First Time in 4 Years" -- USA Today headline the same day, reporting the same story THIS WEEK'S CONTRIBUTORS: MS-Mike Straw, RC-Randy Cassingham DID YOU FIND an error? See http://www.thisistrue.com/errata.html MENSA'S ANNUAL CONFERENCE or "Annual Gathering" (as they call it) is in Reno this year, over the 4th of July. I skipped last year (the last two?), but a good friend of mine is the Chair of the Reno conference, and I long ago promised to be one of his speakers. I gave my talk the title "My Life Among the Obliviots". Here's how they're describing it in the program: "Randy, a Mensa Life Member and the author of the weird news/social commentary column 'This is True', will look back on his 18 years of true stories and share examples of some of the most mind-bogglingly stupid people (or, maybe, smart people doing incredibly stupid things) -- and some of the often shocking (and hilarious) lessons he has learned along the way. Randy bills his column as 'thought-provoking entertainment' (what a concept for reading material!) and his talks follow the same principle." (Too many parentheticals, eh?) Let's just say my friend was *enthusiastic* about the proposed topic. I'm definitely going to have fun with it! As I understand policies, you have to be a member, a speaker, *apply* as a member (by taking an intelligence test there), or be the guest of a member, to attend an AG. So consider this an early heads up if you want to go. For more info see http://www.ag2012.us.mensa.org o o o FOOTBALL COACH JOE Paterno died last weekend. And for 24 hours on Facebook, I saw post after post lamenting the loss of "JoePa". So I posted this to my Facebook status: "I'm having trouble with all the Joe Paterno worship I'm seeing today. Yeah, he was a 'winning football coach' and all, but when he found out one of his assistant coaches was raping little boys in his spare time (even on campus!), he did the very minimum required by law (reported it to his supervisor). He did NOT make sure it stopped, he did NOT make sure that the police had been notified, he did NOT fire the assistant coach, he did NOT apparently follow up at all. Seems to me that failure to act as a human being WAY outweighs being good at a freaking GAME. Who seriously disagrees with that? Really: if you still respect the man, tell me WHY." The response was ASTOUNDING: before I headed to bed there were more than 100 "Likes" of that paragraph, and more than 100 comments posted. (By this afternoon, both numbers had broken 150.) The numbers, though, weren't the astounding part. Rather, it was that more than one TRUE reader UNSUBSCRIBED in protest because (as one said) "I really don't nbeed you or your liberal, judgemental idiots." What, it's "liberal" to be against child rape? Really? So that means to be "conservative" one "nbeed" be PRO child rape? Well, that's the message I (among others) heard, anyway. Another thought such a topic was too loaded for Facebook and, when I refused his repeated demands to delete my paragraph and the comments it generated, he reported it to Facebook to demand of THEM that I be censored. I think it's quite unlikely anyone at Facebook will grant such a demand, but just in case, I copied my paragraph -- and an assortment of the comments, pro AND con -- to my blog, where it will be under my own control to ensure this important discussion can continue. See http://www.thisistrue.com/d-paterno And yeah, I know that the coach involved had retired three years before. I address that on my blog post: he retired but was STILL THERE as a "volunteer" who had keys to the locker room -- and was still bringing children to the university for years AFTER Paterno found out. And the comments are wonderfully thought-provoking. It's all well worth a read, even if you don't give a rat about Paterno. o o o WHAT DID YOU MISS THIS WEEK? Guys rob man who advertised expensive item on Craigslist ...and then re-advertised it themselves, with the victim's original photos. Man holds woman's purse ...for ransom! iPad thief caught just by TELLING her about the tracking technology (she immediately confessed, so they didn't even have to USE it). Vandals caught after using WHAT to do WHAT? Robber gets what he asked for: bag of dog poop. Car dealer reports test-drive vehicle stolen; the man who took it took a bit longer since he dropped by his bank for the money needed to buy it. Man who pulled robbery in fast-food drive-through lane has an interesting excuse as to why. Stop missing 2/3 of the stories! A full year of expanded weekly issues is just $24. For full details see http://thisistrue.com/upgrade.html "WHAT'S THE MINIMUM order to get free shipping on GOOHF cards?" asked Ken in Montana. The minimum available to order (at least, of the standard paper "Get Out of Hell Free" cards) is 100, and shipping is free for that number -- and for one or more boxes of "about" 500. Free shipping (in USA, and often Canada; other countries get discounted shipping) is also available for the plastic cards, the static cling decals, and ALMOST everything else in the shopping cart (including This is True, Stella Awards, and HeroicStories books!) Browse through all the possibilities at https://secure.thisistrue.com THE LATEST POSTING TO JUMBO JOKE: Norwegian Icebreaker Heads up the North Saskatchewan River (*cough*!) http://www.JumboJoke.com ----------==========**********O**********==========---------- You're Ready to Get Some Tools ...and you have no idea what to buy. Tool Wonk will help you get up to speed quickly and not look stupid to salesmen when buying tools, parts, supplies and accessories. http://www.ToolWonk.com ----------==========**********O**********==========---------- TEN YEARS AGO IN TRUE: Some amazing examples of post-9/11 airline security measures: http://www.thisistrue.com/airsecurity.html And don't forget http://i.thisistrue.com for a new story every day on your Android, BlackBerry, iPhone, or other web-enabled phone! THIS WEEK'S HONORARY UNSUBSCRIBE goes to James R. Arnold. A chemist, Arnold saw that a government program designed for political purposes would be of huge scientific benefit if only planners would pay attention. They did, and the program was a bonanza for scientific discovery -- and inspired people worldwide. For the full story see http://www.HonoraryUnsubscribe.com/james_r._arnold.html YOU CAN REALLY HELP TRUE: Send this issue (in its entirety, please) to a friend with your personal recommendation. A friend told YOU about this newsletter, right? Pass the favor on! Thanks. TIRED OF BEING TOLD WHERE TO GO? "Get Out of Hell Free" with our popular and (in?)famous cards, created in response to a reader telling Randy he was doomed. http://www.GOOHF.com SUBSCRIPTIONS to "This is True" are free at http://www.thisistrue.com Published weekly by ThisIsTrue.Inc, PO Box 666, Ridgway CO 81432 USA (ISSN 1521-1932). TRUE is available to newspapers as a regular feature column. "This is True" is a registered trademark of ThisIsTrue.Inc COPYRIGHT 2012 by Randy Cassingham, All Rights Reserved. All stories are completely rewritten using facts from the noted sources. ALL broadcast, publication, retransmission to e-mail lists, WWW or any other copying or storage, in any medium, online or not, is STRICTLY PROHIBITED without PRIOR written permission from the author. MANUAL FORWARDING by e-mail to friends is allowed IF 1) the text is forwarded IN ITS ENTIRETY, from the "Since 1994" line on top through the end of this paragraph and 2) NO FEE is charged. We REQUEST that you forward no more than three copies to any one person -- after that, they should get their own FREE subscription. We ALWAYS appreciate people who report violations of our copyright to us. ThisIsTrue.Inc, PO Box 666, Ridgway, CO 81432, USA
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